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Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain

Author: Sue Gerhardt
Publisher: Routledge
Category: Book

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Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars

17 reviews
Sales Rank: 484

Media: Paperback
Edition: 1
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 232
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.6
Dimensions (in): 7.6 x 5.1 x 0.9

ISBN: 1583918175
Dewey Decimal Number: 155.422
EAN: 9781583918173
ASIN: 1583918175

Publication Date: June 24, 2004
Availability: Usually dispatched within 1-2 business days
Shipping: International shipping available
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Customer Reviews:

Showing reviews 6-10 of 17

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Wonderful book on how your parenting DOES matter June 15, 2007
11 out of 11 found this review helpful

This book tells you that how you parent really does influence your child's development. That your parenting style actually affects how your baby's brain develops.

The first half is more technical, but still readable. The second half gets into the consequences of early-years parenting.

It will make you think about your own parenting decisions, that's for sure!

5 out of 5 stars

Brilliant October 24, 2006
23 out of 26 found this review helpful

Imposible to praise this book highly enough. Manages to be technically detailed and scholarly whilst still remaining simple enough for the layperson (me). Don't be mislead by the title as this is far from being a cuddly self-help book.

5 out of 5 stars

Buy it and read it! August 1, 2006
24 out of 28 found this review helpful

Should be required reading for all parents and those working with children. Actually, I would go further, it should be handed to all new parents by their community midwives!

At times, you might wince as you read it, but it is a really important piece and goes a long way to explain the human psyche and the "plastic" and "flexible" development of an infant's brain.

If we all read, understood and adopted the practices recommended in this book, the world would definitely be a better place!! I know this sounds crass, but read it and you will see what I mean!

5 out of 5 stars

The Key to a better society and a better world February 13, 2006
146 out of 152 found this review helpful

Before examining the book's content I believe it is important to state that in my opinion this book would be a far easier read for those with some background knowledge of John Bowlby's attachment theory or at least prior reading on the subject of parent-child relationships.

Obviously I am speaking from my own level of intelligence, (not too intelligent but an avid reader) I should imagine that there are many parents and lay people who would enjoy reading this book without the above prerequisites.

For maybe the first third of the book I found it quite heavy going because the focus is upon the development of the child's brain in relation to certain types of parenting.

Therefore, there is a lot of exploration into the structure of the brain and how certain parts such as the Hypocampus and Hypothalamus work in conjunction with other parts such as neurotransmitters like serotonin and cortisol. Initially the book seemed quite cold and technical.

Moving on, the book goes on to provide strong evidence for the work of John Bowlby and Attachment theory, illustrating how neglectful, emotionally ambivalent and emotionally distant parenting styles create brain structures and chemical imbalances that leave children prone to rage, aggression, hyper tension, violence, depression and addiction in adulthood.

At times I found the book disturbing when considering how many children are disadvantaged in this way, especially considering the problems they face in later life.

On the other hand this book is of huge importance to the lay person, professionals, policy makers and most particularly anyone who has or plans to have children.

The prominent message here is that a great many if not all of our social ills, war, violence, addiction, crime and murder (to mention but a few) are the consequences of unresponsive and abusive parenting.

Undoubtedly many parents may feel defensive reading this book, but I would defy anyone to offer a scientifically sound counter argument to the evidence presented within it. Also it is worth noting that the main thrust of the book is not to establish blame, but to throw light on what was previously unknown so that we may eradicate these needlessly destructive patterns.

The bottom line is that this book has huge potential to effect massive social change. In seeing how these maladaptive attachment and parenting styles lead to first personal problems and then serious social ones, we have the solution to making changes for the future of our children and theirs in turn.

Overall this book is a humanistic subject approached from a scientific perspective. Make no mistake this book is one of the most important I have and ever will read. Without a doubt it will also be the same for anyone reading the book.

Finally, in addition to being highly informative, it is also optimistic in pointing out that change is not impossible, but prevention is the key to a better society and a better world.

5 out of 5 stars

Finally, an explanation on why abandonment is so damaging February 13, 2006
80 out of 83 found this review helpful

I am the director of a foundation that works in Romanian orphanages and children's hospitals. For years we have been perceived as amateurs by the therapists because we focus on providing the children with individual attention and affection. It is such a HUGE relief to find a book that makes our work worthwhile. The damage that Dr Gerhardt describes is seen 100 times over in children who have not just been disregarded, but have been truly abandoned: left to themselves for month after month with only staff workers to change and feed them. Babies that stop crying because no one responds to their desperation are horribly broken. The attitude that they will grow out of it is so misguided and hurtful. I would LOVE to have the book available in Romanian. It could have a profound effect if people understood what is happening when they think that taking care of the baby's physical needs is enough.